Empathizing with Junior

           My favorite book of the year, by far, is Everything Matters! due to that fact that we did not complete a Data Sheet on this piece. The end. Just kidding, we wrote three in-class essays on it, so clearly, we did not avoid any work. I always seem to face many major predicaments while completing Data Sheets.  I wasted "precious moments" of Ms. Serensky's life  The conversation: " For the setting do we have to include... like street names?" Ms. Serensky replied "Precious moments of my life are ticking away right now." If we were to complete another Data Sheet for Everything Matters!, I would have inevitably had a question. Due to the typical nature of my questions, I would have wasted more "precious moments" of her life. None of this happened when reading Everything Matters!, which adds to the likability of the novel. Another crucial likability factor is the ability of a reader to sympathize, or better yet empathize with the characters. I found myself empathizing with Junior. Right from the start, we discover the umbilical cord wrapped around fetus Junior's neck: "The umbilical chord draws tighter around your throat"(5). In case you did not know, the umbilical chord was wrapped around my neck as well. Note: this did not at all contribute to the largeness of my head. Due to our similar prenatal situations, I empathized with a fetus right off the bat on page five of the novel. Not often do you find yourself empathizing with a character so soon without more personal information, better yet a fetus. I did. Similarly, I used to "Sit on the kitchen floor...and brood like an unhappy child" as Junior does (37). As a child, we had a three-level shelf in the kitchen next to the window, one of the shelves at the bottom about one inch from the ground. Whenever my sister and I got in trouble or were just looking for something to do, we would go sit on the bottom shelf and laugh, cry, or not laugh and cry. It was the cool hang out spot at the Ross Household until my 6'3 father decided to dance around the kitchen one day and shake the floor until the shelves fell over and broke. Junior and I, we both needed some alone time, though he sat on the floor ...and technically, I sat on a shelf an inch from the floor.Close enough. On a more serious note, the book made me think about my life and my future, which made me a little scared. I fear doing something that I do not enjoy.  I began to realize, just as Junior does, that "It does all matter. All of it"(268).  I feel as if after reading this novel, I have had an epiphany of sorts. I need to do what I enjoy in life, like eating Fig Newtons and watching basketball.And maybe even get a job so that I do not end up living in a cardboard box. Maybe aspire to be on Saturday Night Live one day. Clearly, I related well to this novel. Thank you Ron Currie Jr., for this wonderful piece of literature.

My Top 10

These are in order from least thrilling(10), to most thrilling (1).

10. The day I learned the value of paying attention in class. It was in 10th grade Honors Algebra II when I got a D on a test(in other words I thought that the world was going to end) and so I tried very hard to understand the next chapter. I did significantly better on the next test(a D+, just kidding it was an A), and thus from then on forward, and to this day, I pay attention in class. It will improve your grades drastically that I would "bet you anything"(Wilde 17). I would bet you a million dollars. 

9. The day Ms. Serensky read my Dream Journal out loud to the class as part of her "Blog Banter." It is always nice to know that someone appreciates your writings even though every other word is spelled wrong. When you are in third grade and do not know how to spell "stub," you should possess some concern because, quite frankly, "its pretty simple"(Currie 156). It was especially reassuring when Ms. Serensky told me "It's alright" after I told her that I was indeed in third grade at that time, and visibly a bit behind the learning curve in the writing department. This particular moment finally assured me that "It's alright" that I could not form a sentence in third grade. I feel a little bit smarter and maybe I can go off to college now. Thanks, Ms. Serensky.

8.  Though they do not have a high school class called, "Outfit Styling" in our school, I believe that dressing appropriately for school or any type of public venue is extremely important. Thus, when Mark Wood first walked onto the stage in orchestra with his skin tight leather laced up pants and see through white shirt, I learned something very important. What not to wear EVER! I would never wear such an outfit unless in costume, "I'd sooner die" (Wilde 25). Though I appreciate his spunk and eclectic sense of style, it taught me a very important lesson in which I consider to fall under the category of academically thrilling.

7. The day I learned how to say the word "corn" in French class. One might tell you that they learned how to say "corn," or "le mais" in Middle School French, but I did not learn such a thing until high school French. This moment was academically thrilling not only due to the fact that corn falls into my top five favorite foods , but due to the fact that this very word helped me many a time on French speaking exams. One time the speaking prompt was: "How do you spend your money?" Of course, I went on a corn field day with that one, "you can hardly imagine"(Wilde 15). Corn was about the only word I knew, and it helped me to get an A on the speaking exam multiple times.

6. The day I finished the book Nickel and Dimed by Barbara Er...I refer to her as Barbara, plainly and simply. Ms. Serensky, I know you will probably roll your eyes when you read this, but I it needs to be said: I never fully read a novel/play/short story for school up until that point. Therefore, this moment made me feel like a true scholar. I could finally classify myself as a scholarly student! Success! You are probably thinking to yourself, "Are you serious?"(Currie 149). Yes, I am serious. This was one of the most fulfilling days of my life.

5. The day we beat the "Dream Team" at the multiple choice game. Though some people believe that I "leech off of Kaleigh and that my claim to fame is Kaleigh," I still find this day to be most academically thrilling. And people, you are right, Kaleigh and her 92% always help our team out. But we must not forget Emily and Cat who get alot of answers right as well and help Kaleigh to settle me down when I realize how many answers that I have gotten wrong proportional to the total number or problems! I look at my score and "I'm disappointed in myself"(Currie 165).

4. The day that I got back my paper in which we wrote about what we would do if the world were to end upon turning 36. Finally, I realized that maybe I should actually try to make an appearance on Saturday Night Live one day. It made me truly take into consideration the advantages of possessing a big forehead and a little sense of humor, as there can never be enough Junices, or "Dooneeses" as some say. This epiphany was quite the thrill, as I realized that I might as well try and do something entertaining with my life besides become a corporate lawyer! I boredom might cause me to end up "as crazy as loons"(Kesey 145).

3.Writing the argument essay on my AP Exam. The saddest thing is that I am not sure that I am even spelling argument right. I enjoyed writing it. Let me just say that I do not at all write argument essays in my spare time, "I swear"(Kesey 47). Anyhow, on my AP Exam Argument essay, I based a body paragraph on Indiana Pacers fans and how I am able to diss them in a humorous way in order to avoid hurting their feelings too much. I love basketball, and I hate people who are not Cavs fans, so to describe my methods of dissing Cavs haters on the AP Exam was quite a thrill, and an essay in which I wish I had a copy of.

2. The day I received an English award last year. The only other school related award that I had ever won was the "Perfect Attendance Award" in 8th grade. I was so proud of my "Perfect Attendance Award" because it was my only one, that I framed it. All I had to do was show up to school, nothing else. That's what makes the whole matter so sad. This is what I thought when I approached Ms. Serensky after not being there: 'She's [Ms. Serensky] so furious"(Kesey 5).

1. Passing my AP Exams. Anything to take less classes in college next year. I need as much time as possible to devote to Buckeye sports. I knew that I should knock out some credits, "I just thought it would be better"(Kesey 265). Go Bucks!

Discrepancies

          My favorite poem, Stephen Dunn's "Discrepancies," is not my favorite due to it's content. I did enjoy the content of the poem might I add. This poem provided me with another recorded memory, just as my childhood dream journal did. The most bizarre of events occurred due to this poem, which ultimately led to my possession of yet another reminder of how truly unique I still am to this day, just as my childhood dream journal reminds me of how truly unique I was before. I openly admit to this uniqueness, and "it probably goes without saying"(108). Anyhow, my interpretation of the implications of Stephen Dunn's work was that you should look to gain a better understanding of the people around you and look to see their true colors. In the poem, Dunn directly refers to a lady with a jewel on her forehead. Therefore, I thought that I should make my title "The Jeweled Forehead," as I wanted my title to pertain to the poem as much a possible, as well as the immediate focus of my work. I was a bit skeptical though, to really name my paper "The Jeweled Forehead", as I thought that Ms, Serensky would believe me to be a racist when that was not at all the intention of my title. I decided to call Katie Connolly, a voice of reason, to consult her about the appropriateness of this title. She said something along the lines of, "Why is that a problem?"(132). She did not find it to be as big of a deal as I did. Somehow, though we STILL can not figure out how this happened, Katie's cell phone recorded our entire conversation, start to finish. It was the most bizarre thing ever, and the most bizarre conversation ever if you could call it that! Personally, I believe that it was meant to be, as this magically recorded conversation might even top my childhood journal entries. I can not really describe it to you, except for the fact that it was just kind of a little bit funny. When I listen to it I usually laugh, though I only listen to it about once a month since that’s about "all I can manage"(197). I will tell you this, it is quite interesting. Without Stephen Dunn and his poem "Discrepancies," I would not have magically obtained this recorded conversation about the title of my poem. I will probably try and keep it on my phone forever,  like my Dream Journal, as it is a little reminder of my childhood, or in this case teen years, that just really makes me laugh.   English just seems to provide me with ways to form and rekindle such great memories. Thank you, Stephen! And that is why Stephen Dunn's poem will always be my favorite. It provided me with just another memory of myself as a child. I still refer to myself as a child due to the fact that I have the maturity level of a five year old.

It's the Best Day Ever

            The date was Monday, January 31, 2011, to be precise. Since I’m being so precise, I should probably add that I walked into the classroom from the hallway at about 9:27 and headed towards my seat, reached my seat and sat down on it, got out my English materials needed for class that day, then sat down and waited for class to start. If I were to give it a grade on the AP scale, I would give it a 9-, which obviously means that it was my favorite day. Anyhow, “Bobbie’s Blog Banter” soon followed. At the end of her “banter,” she suggested that I dress up as an old man for Halloween next year. This is why it was my favorite day, and why I gave this day a “9-” on the AP grading scale. Had Ms. Serensky suggested that I dress up like a beautiful model or Mo Williams I would give this day a “9/9+,” or potentially even a “9+.” Most people do not consider the day their English teacher tells them to dress up like an old man to be their favorite. I do. Had Ms. Serensky not suggested such a thing, I would not have ventured down to the basement to look for the picture of me as a fourth grader when I actually did dress up as an old man. Upon looking at this picture, most people blurt out “He’s beautiful”(243). Just kidding. When people first laid eyes on the sight, that being me in my old mad get up, they probably thought that they were “sitting there hallucinating a mile a minute”(114). I mean who in their right mind dresses up like an old man? I wish people would have told me “I state quite frankly and openly that you seem to me to be in every way the visible personification of absolute perfection”(31). I mean I thought that I looked good. If I had not ventured down to find this picture, I would not have stumbled across the infamous “Dream Journal” in which I detailed the events of my life from ages 9-11. Therefore, I will forever remember and cherish the day in English in which Ms. Serensky suggested the old man look and helped me to unearth my childhood journal. After referencing my coveted journal so many times, I find it most appropriate to share with you the entry that makes it me like it so much, as well as make this day in English my absolute favorite:

“Hi! Im back. It is nigth! Today we played on the swing set for a long time for so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so long. We played gimungo rocks. Baseicly you swing and than the person who does not swing sneeks to the front yard and gets some rocks from the jarden and they are gimungo rocks they are so so so so so so so so so big and gimungo they come and threw them at us on the when we swing and try to hit us with them and then sneek back to the rocks and get more. It is so much fun I got hit with a rock on my feet and then my shoe come off but not my foot and my toe hurts becuase it is the little one on the end! I do not want a snub becuase my foot falls off. Good nigth. God blesse.”  

A Visit to the Wilderness

This conversation took place between William Bibbet and Ralph a few days after William Bibbet's mother becomes friends with Nurse Ratched. Upon Nurse Ratched setting foot into the Bibbet household for the first time for some dinner, William Bibbet laid eyes on her and immediately evacuated the area. He end up in a wooded area of Sedona, though William "Billy" Bibbet does not have the slightest idea of where he is. He comes across a man named Ralph.
Billy: "No! I d-d-didn't! I was..."(315)

Ralph: "Didn't do what?"

Billy: "Do-do-don't hurt me! Puh-puh-puh-lease."

Ralph: "I'm not going to hurt you. I live here among the squirrels, snakes, and bears my friend."

Billy: "Where am I?"

Ralph: "Sedona."

Billy: "I have been running for a l-l-l-l-l-l-l-long time now. I hope they don't catch me"

Ralph: "Who?"

Billy: "Duh-duh-don't tell"(315).

Ralph: "Who?"

Billy" Don't tell anyone th-tha-a-at you saw me here. D-d-d-on't tell my mother!"

Ralph: "I don't plan on returning to civilization soon, better yet ever. My wife, Bev, hates me. Bev is disda..."

Billy: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Ralph: (looks around concernedly) Where is Bev?

Billy: "AHHHHHH it's Nurse Ratched!"

Ralph: "Sir, I believe you just laid eyes on a wild bear."

Billy: "It-it-it-it's her. NURSE RATCHED!"

Ralph: "No need to be frightened. Are you frightened?"

Billy: "No, my name is William Bibbet.B-b-b-ut you can call me B-B-illy."

Ralph: "I'm Ralph. My daily activities consist of squirrel watching, snake hunting, and waiting for the world to end. How about you?"

Billy: " Th-th-ere's something over there, a-a-and it looks alot like Nurse Ratched."

Ralph: "Don't worry, I get along with the bears out here, and the squirrels, but those snakes...I'll show you. This brown beauty in particular, I feed him berries and the leftovers of anything I catch. Sometimes these wonders of nature are my sounding board out here. I tell them about my wife and family. Like I was saying before, my wife "Bev is disdainful. She looks down her nose at me."(254).

Billy: "Y-y-you feed the b-b-b-bear?"

Ralph: "Yes, and right about now he looks like could use a little snacky-poo. Better go give it to him. You don't mess with the bears out here."

Billy: "H-h-hoooowwww?"

Ralph: "Well, it's not easy. I'm gonna get real weird with it. There is no normal way to feed a bear without putting your life in danger."

Billy: "o-o-k"

Ralph:  Anyways, like I was saying, my wife Bev and I, "We were a mismatch."(255).

Billy: "o-oh"

Ralph: "Oh, I forgot to mention, this bear right here doesn't always like my leftovers. If he sniffs 'em and does not like them, you will probably be his next meal..."

Billy runs off in a state of panic, clearly favoring dinner with Nurse Ratched at this point.

The Belligerents of AP English 12

            If you can believe it, I, Randle Patrick McMurphy, took AP English in 12^th grade. “Oh, I’m a thinker all right,”(107).  I was fully capable of taking that class. I acted similarly in that class to the way I act now, and I am not sure how much my teacher Ms. Feyrensky appreciated it. If there is one thing I know for sure, that Ms. Feyrensky liked me more than “Old Lady Ratched”(216). She hates me. The funny thing is, I am surprised that Ratched did not see the likes of me much earlier, in particular April 8^th of my senior year, the day I flew off the wall in English class. I nearly landed myself in a mental institution. Afterwards, a classmate of mine Kaleigh said, “Deep breathes, it’s not the end of the world.” Ms. Feyrensky looked a little concerned. Here is what happened. It was the morning of April 8^th, 2011. Ms. Feyrensky chose me to read a part in the Oscar Wilde play that we were reading in class at the time, The Importance of Being Earnest I believe. Anyhow, despite my belligerent nature, I did not feel at all capable enough to successfully fulfill my role as a character. In the institution, I am always causing a stir or putting on a production, like the time I was sent up to disturbed after an altercation with a few workers. The time I screamed at Washington, “You’re nothing but a…“(273). The rest should remain unspoken. Despite my constant dramatics, I did not satisfactorily read my part. My uncharacteristic monotone did not meet Ms. Feyrensky’s standards. She stopped me and encouraged me to put more passion into my role. I declined, but not in the most civil of manners. I told her straight up, “Ms. Feyrensky, you chose me to read this part, I didn’t even want to.” I never have a problem speaking my mind. I had an outburst in which Ms. Feyrensky did not see coming. I was all fired up, and speaking in a disrespectful manner. Usually, I feel as if I am bettering the greater good when I speak my mind. Like when I spoke up to Nurse Ratched and took the boys on a fishing trip. This was the one time that I did not feel that way. I disrespected Ms. Feyrensky and I regret it. I mean she never scared me and went off on me. She was not even scary. Half of the freshman class was taller than her. In other words, how could she be scary? I have issues with anyone who publically announces or insinuates that she scares the freshman. She did not even scare the freshman. An apology is probably still in order, though it was years ago. I’m sorry, Ms. Feyrensky.  That was the worst day ever in AP English 12.

 

You Need to Know...

Dear Voice that talks to Junior,
        I wish that you would have just popped on into my head say August 23rd of 2009. I understand that you were a little preoccupied with the apocalypse, but I could have used a little guidance. At about 9:26 a.m., upon entering Ms. Serensky's room for the first time, you should have just came out and told me, "You need to understand this truth"(8). I am not speaking of the apocalypse. You needed to just tell me straight from the start, "You need to understand this truth: To be in this class you need to know how to read, as in you need to read more than one book a year, not counting picture books" Clearly, I could have used this forewarning. Also, it would have been nice to know ahead of time that on the last day of school I would feel compelled to announce to the whole class my dislike for leisurely reading by saying, "I did not like this book. But then again, I do not read leisurely." Not one of my better ideas. With you there, I could have avoided such a moment. I could have avoided trying to compensate for my remark by guaranteeing my teacher upon leaving the room for the last time that year that I would "read 100 books this summer for sure." Who does that? Unfortunately, this was a minor offense compared to some of the other things I did last year. When Mariel demanded that I share the story about my head, you could have told me, "You're about to make the most important decision of your life to date"(190). By "the most important decision of my life to date" I mean whether or not to tell the story about my big head as a baby. It would have been nice to know that if I told this story, that it would make its way onto the third quarter quotes sheet and that people that were not even in AP English would approach me and ask me for the full scoop in my jumbo sized head. Though I am generally a pretty good student, you would not have approved of my decision to schedule an appointment during school, especially on the day of Spring fest. You probably would have abandoned me forever rather than simply telling me that "We have no choice but to suspend our usual stance of supportive neutrality"(116). See, this is why I needed you to tell me about the future. I need to know when important things are coming up. I am not psychic. The closest crystal ball to me is the one at the Science Center, and I do not even think that it is an actual crystal ball since it did not tell me anything the last time I looked into it. A sister needed some scheduling help, and you were not there to provide it. All in all, I could have used you. But I’d say it is too late now. The more that I think about it, you would have creeped me out.
           
Thanks for allowing me to make a fool of myself multiple times last year,
 Sarah


I needed one of these